1st Step: Keep your eye on the prize : Discuss absolutely keeping your eye on the prize
2nd Step: Lose battle to win wars: Let go of your need to be right in favor of your goal
3rd Step: Ground your communication in empathy, compassion and love: Communicate where you treat the other as your equal, love the one with whomsoever you speak
4th Step: Practice unilateral virtue: Live with your own moral code on your day-to-day interaction. Take responsibility for living by the values that you find meaningless and virtuous.
5th Step: Communicate for yourself, not to change your partner: This style of communication is that before you even begin to discuss an issue, you are setting up a pattern where the listener will have to defend themself.
6th Step: Communicate with dignity and gravity: Support value and encourage yourself when you are triggered by another.
7th Step: Listen for the deepest wants to desires: Pick what is being not being spoken.
8th Step: Focus on 'From Now On': Never pick up the past and rehash it with present. When something is unresolved instead of resurfacing it everytime, resolve it now by not injuring each other distressing and hurt your partner.
9th Step: Make clear plans and agreements: Make clear plans and agreements after you have expressed yourself.
10th Step: If appropriate, negotiate solutions: Negotiate possible solutions
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