How to reduce stress very fast

1.  Deep Breathing: Shift from shallow to deep breathing, help with more oxygen push to relax
2. Hydration: Sip water at regular intervals
3. Write Down: Write what's in your mind and how it's causing you stress. 
4. Stretch: By shifting your physical state and watch your physiology relax.
5. Talk it out: Reach out to professional, friend, colleague, family members etc
6. Power naps: Quick and brief nap can help you shake off stress
7. Time in nature: Walk in a garden or greenery.
8. Calming music: Soothing music shifts your attention from something calmer
9. Practice mindfulness: Bring your attention to the present moment and notice that you are safe and well. 

Remedy for Sun For Everyone

 Sun signifies VITALITY, PERSONALITY, GENERAL HEALTH, FATHER, RANK, AUTHORITY, HIGH POSITION, POLITICS, POLITICAL CAREER, GOVERNMENT JOB etc.

Sun affliction gives ARROGANCE, WAVERING TEMPARAMENT, HAUGHTY, PROUD, JEALOUS, OVER AMBITIOUS, IRRITABLE, ANGRY, SELF OPINIONATED, DOMINATING, NATURE, EXTRAVAGANCE, OBSTACLES, DIFFICULTIES, IMMORAL AND SPITEFUL.

When Sun is badly placed in your birthchart or he is in debilitated position will give INAUSPICIOUS, HEALTH PROBLEMS, FEVER, HEADACHE, EYE TROUBLES, PROBLEMS WITH HIGHER OFFICIALS & POLITICIANS. 

• Sun in 12th house (Losses) might indicate a lack of recognition or difficulties with authority figures.
• Sun in 6th house (Debts, Disputes) would indicate challenges to self esteem or facing authority.
• Sun is Neecha or Debilitated or Weakest in Libra (Sun's qualities like leadership/individuality might be suppressed)
• Sun's interaction with Mars, Saturn or Rahu can influence Sun's expression. Sun's confidence, vitality and ego will be hurt when Mars, Saturn or Rahu aspects Sun.

• Worship Sun on Krittika, Uttara Phalguni, Uttarashada, Pratipada, Navami Tithis
• Worship Sun through Suryadhandam and Offer water to Sun at Sunrise
• Chant Aditya Hridayam
• Worship Suryanarayana 
• Worship Muneeshwara, Kalabhairava
• Donate Chapati, money to old men
• Respect old men, officers

Ketu based Remedies

 Ketu signfies SPIRITUALITY, SECRECY, MATERNAL GRANDPARENTS, ENLIGHTENMENT, APPARENT OBSTACLES ON WAY TO ENLIGHTENMENT, COMPLETE KNOWLEDGE, INDOLENCE, SECLUSION, ECCENTRICITY, RENUNCIATION, ASCETICISM, MYSTICISM, ESOTERIC KNOWLEDGE, PSYCHIC ABILITIES, ABSTRACTION, SUBLIMATION, TRANSFORMATION, SEPERATION, DIVIDEDNESS, KUNDALINI, UNCONTROLLABLE MASS OF ENERGY, ELECTRICITY, BRIGHTNESS, FLAME, LAMP, TELEVISION, APPARTITION, WITCHCRAFT, INTRIGUES, SUSPICION, CORRUPTION, SCANDALS etc. mainly ILLUSIONS, DRISHTI DOSHA, LOSS OF CONFIDENCE, INFERIORITY COMPLEX, LONELYNESS, HEALTH PROBLEMS, ALLERGIES, MENTAL TENSION etc.

When afflicted KETU is in a native's horoscope 

WORRIES, SUSPICIOIUS NATURE OF MIND, HIDDEN DIFFICULTIES, UNFORESEEN CIRCUMSTANCES, IMPEDIMENTS, INSANITY, AMPUTATION

• Ketu placed in 6th house: Represents challenges or troubles from disputes, debts and health issues. 
• Ketu placed in 8th house: Obstacles or delays related to transformation, death and inheritance
• Ketu placed in 12th house: Obstacles or troubles related to finance, isolation or living away from homeland.

Ketu remedies

• Ketu god is signified by Ganesha
• Ketu pooja should be done on Ashwini nakshatra, Magha nakshatra, Moola nakshatra
• Donate horsegram to Monasteries
• Donate 5 Bananas, Jasmine flowers, Jaggery based Modhaka to Ganesha Temple
• Feed young monks
• Feed Monks with food, bananas, sweets

Rahu based Remedies for Family

 Rahu signifies WORLDLINESS, MATERIALISM, PATERNAL GRANDPARENTS, TRANSFORMATION, SUDDEN CHANGES, EXCITEMENT, ALERTNESS, INTELLIGENCE, EXOTERIC KNOWLEDGE, GLAMOUR, FAME, ILLUSION, DECEPTION, FEAR, SUSPICION, PHOBIA, UPROAR, RIOTS, REVOLTS, REBELLION, INSANITY, DEFORMATION, SOPHISTICATION, SCIENCE, TECHNOLOGY, PSYCHOLOGY, PSYCHIATRY, METAPHYSICS, INITIATION, DESTINATION, REINCARNATION etc.

When Rahu is affected or Malefic then the native will have COMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR, HEDONISTIC TENDENCY, CHANGE OF RESIDENCE, MENTAL TENSION, MISUNDERSTANDING, HEALTH PROBLEMS LIKE ALLERGIES, MENTAL ILLUSION. 

RAHU DOSHA when 

• Rahu is at 4th house: Challenges in family life or relationship with mother
• Rahu in 7th house: Obstacles in finding a suitable partner and marriage issues
• Rahu in 8th house: Suggest unexpected events or delays in many areas
• Rahu in 12th house: Issues related to finance, isolation or living away from homeland.

Rahu pooja should be done at 

• Ardra Nakshatra, Swati Nakshatra, Shatabisha Nakshatra, Ashtami and Amavasa Tithi
• Tuesday and Saturdays are good for propitiation.
• Nagaraja God propitiation on Tuesdays & Saturdays with milk abhisheka, garland, agarbathi, camphor, sambhrani.
• Choudeshwari poojai with very good alankara
• Provide Salt & Curds
• Donate Gram Dal
• Donate Mustard Oil to Nagaraja Temple or Choudeshwari Temple
• Very good alankaram for Munishwara and Perfumes
• Provide Bananas, Puffed Rice to the poor or for temple bhaktas
• Puffed rice based sweet

Mars Remedies for Family

 Mars signifies ENERGY, STRENGTH, YOUNGER SIBLINGS, INDEPENDENCE, INITIATIVE, MOTIVATION, DETERMINATION, AMBITION, ENDURANCE, COURAGE, CHARACTER, MANLINESS, POWER, IMPATIENCE, ZEAL, ENTHUSIASM, PASSION, PIONEERING, ADVENTURE, SPORTS, COMPETITION, FRANKNESS, RESOURCEFULNESS, MANAGEMENT, RESEARCH, TECHNOLOGY, LABORATORIES, CHEMISTRY, MATHEMATICS, LOGIC, DIFFERENCE OF OPINION, LITIGATION, ARGUMENT, MISUNDERSTANDING, ANGER, AGRESSION etc. 

Mars Affliction gives RASHNESS, SHORT TEMPER, AGGRESSIVE TEMPERAMENT, CUNNING, THIEVISH NATURE, SCOUNDREL, SEXUAL MALPRACTICE, IMPULSIVE DESIRES, FANATICISM, STUBBORN AND UNTRUSTWORTHY

Mars Affliction will give FINANCIAL PROBLEMS, DEBTS, BLOOD RELATED DISEASES, LOSS OF LANDED PROPERTY, ACCIDENTS, FAILED MARRIAGE.

Mars Affliction happen when 

• Debilitated (Neecha) Mars -> Mars at Cancer is debilitated
• Mangalik Dosha or Kuja Dosha
• Mars at Lagna 
• Mars at 4th house
• Mars at 8th house
• Mars at 12th house
• Sarpa Dosha
• Rahu at Lagna or lagna lord will make the native suffer from Sarpa Dosha
• Ketu at Lagna or lagna lord will make the native suffer from Sarpa Dosha
• Mars and Rahu combo can strengthen Sarpa Dosha
• Saturn and Rahu combo can or cannot strengthen Sarpa Dosha
• Mars and Ketu combo can strengthen Sarpa Dosha
• Saturn and Ketu combo can strengthen Sarpa Dosha based on house 
• Bratru Shaapa Dosha
• When MARS-SATURN-SUN placed in 3rd house aspected by Rahu-Ketu could challenge your siblings destiny
• When RAHU-KETU placed in 3rd house aspects lagna or lagna lord or 6th house or 6th house lord indicate quarrels with Siblings
• Condition of lagna and 3rd house in horoscope can influence relationship with siblings
• Ongoing dasha connected to 3rd house or 3rd house lord with Rahu-Ketu

• Propitiate on Mrigashira Nakshatra, Bharani Nakshatra and Chitra Nakshatra and Tritiya & Ekadashi Tithis
• Donate Red Lentils to the underprivileged or for Annadhaanam
• Donate Red Clothes to security guards, police, army people
• Donate Jaggery to the underprivileged or for Annadhaanam
• Wear Red Coral
• Exercise regularly, particularly on Tuesday and Mrigashira, Bharani & Chitra, Tritiya & Ekadashi Tithi
• Muruga Temple, Hanuman Temple, Varahi Temple, Narasimha Temple

Saturn Remedies For Family Members

 Saturn Signifies PERFECTION, INTROSPECTION, CONSCIENCE, DISCIPLINE, ASCETISM, SERVANT, DETACHMENT, YOGA, CONTEMPLATION, MEDITATION, INNER SILENCE, TRANSCENDENCE, GATEWAY TO ENGLIGHTENMENT, INNERGURU, PHILOSOPHY, METAPHYSICS, RELIGION, MONASTERIES, GRIEF, DEPRESSION, PATIENCE, ENDURANCE, PERSISTENCE, RESPONSIBILITY, SERIOUSNESS, SENSE OF DUTY, SLOWNESS, RETARDATION, OBSTACLES, PROBLEMS, FRUSTRATION, SEPERATING INFLUENCE, COOLNESS, CONTRACTION, CAUTION, SUSPICION, RESERVATION, EXPLORATION, DISCOVERY, INVENTION, SCIENCE etc. 

When Saturn is not favorable position in birth chart or in transit

• Saturn transit in 12th, 1st and 2nd house from Moon (Sade Sathi Shani)
• Saturn transit in 8th house from Moon (Ashtama Shani)
• Debilitated (Neecha) Saturn
• Weak Saturn (Balya avasthe, Mritavasthe)
• Saturn conjoined with Rahu or Ketu
• Saturn conjoined with Moon or aspected by Moon 
• Saturn conjoined with Mars

FEARFUL, SLOW, SKEPTICAL, MELANCHOLIC, INDIFFERENT, CALLOUS, INCOMPETENT, CRUEL, DELAY, HEALTH PROBLEM, BUSINESS LOSSES, LOSS OF RESPECT

• Feed food for crows, pigeons, birds
• Feed rice powder for ants
• Feed vegetables/greens for cows
• Feed food for beggars, scavengers, destitute
• Feed food for patients, cripples, old and wretched.
• Provide cloth, umbrella, shoe for the poor
• Provide iron utensils for poor woman
• Provide Til Oil for Saturn temple on Saturdays
• Provide Til Oil and Til based Puliogere on Saturdays

Anuradha Star: Saturn Remedy

Pushya Star: Saturn Remedy

Uttara Bhadrapada Star: Saturn Remedy

Saptami: Saturn Remedy

Pournami: Saturn Remedy

• Saturn Neecha in Divaker
• Saturn Neecha in Youvsha
• Saturn Aspected by Moon, Beau
• Saturn Dasha, Saturn Bhukti till Dec 2025, Bhavani

10 Steps For Best Communicative Powers With Everyone

1st Step: Keep your eye on the prize : Discuss absolutely keeping your eye on the prize

2nd Step: Lose battle to win wars: Let go of your need to be right in favor of your goal

3rd Step: Ground your communication in empathy, compassion and love: Communicate where you treat the other as your equal, love the one with whomsoever you speak

4th Step: Practice unilateral virtue: Live with your own moral code on your day-to-day interaction. Take responsibility for living by the values that you find meaningless and virtuous.

5th Step: Communicate for yourself, not to change your partner: This style of communication is that before you even begin to discuss an issue, you are setting up a pattern where the listener will have to defend themself. 

6th Step: Communicate with dignity and gravity: Support value and encourage yourself when you are triggered by another. 

7th Step: Listen for the deepest wants to desires: Pick what is being not being spoken.

8th Step: Focus on 'From Now On': Never pick up the past and rehash it with present. When something is unresolved instead of resurfacing it everytime, resolve it now by not injuring each other distressing and hurt your partner.

9th Step: Make clear plans and agreements: Make clear plans and agreements after you have expressed yourself.

10th Step: If appropriate, negotiate solutions: Negotiate possible solutions

How To Help Someone Who Is Depressed

You don't need to be feel helpless, if someone close to you is suffering from depression.

Reach Out: Depression is very isolating experience, so first reach out them as a first aid.

Depressed People Feel Isolated: The most common thing people do when they are isolated is cut themselves off from the world around them, the most beneficial thing to do with anyone who is depressed is to surround them with people.

Have Patience: Don't be afraid to call or text even if they aren't super responsive. It's always easier to reach out rather than leaving it up to them.

Avoid Cliches: Avoid cliches like "Things will get better"

• "Tomorrow is another day"
• "I Know how you're feeling"

It will get better: Never say "It'll get Better"

Empathy: Better say "Sorry that this happened to you" or "You don't deserve this"

Everyone has their own coping strategies: Being around the person and allowing them to know that you won't flee if they cry enough for them to feel less isolated.

Validate how they are feeling: Acknowledge you cannot fix the person's problems or telling them things will be better - You are trying to validate their feeling.

If you don't know how you can help, try asking!: Ask, don't guess what the other person require.

Acceptance: Another person need to vent, another person want may want you to sit with him and watch TV, accept where the person is at

Listening is everything: Be there for your friend and listen to him when they are ready to speak.

Be Patient: Your friend need someone to hear them out, they will bottle it to be told to you or someone else

Come from a place of nonjudgement: Accept what the person is feeling without any judgement or prejudice

Keep your expectations low: Understand that just sitting with them is OK

Just sitting with them is enough: They should know that there is someone worthy enough to go out of the way for them

You're not expected to fix it: You're not an entertainer or being funny will not pull them out of the dark, being there is required not comedy.

Be helpful: Depression often makes simple tasks impossible, lend a practical hand for anyone who is depressed.

Offering a hand might go a long way: Help to clean the dishes, tidy up the home, being in organized space is easy and more comfortable, aesthetically pleasing boosts people's mood.

Be delicate and tread lightly: Flowers are very good gifts at this time, makes comfy for anyone.

Exercise is hugely beneficial: Physical exercise battles depression in a massive way, invite your friend for a walk or to partake any form of physical activity

Lead by example: Take the lead role which may aid to get you both moving

Encourage them to get help: Encourage outside help, particularly professional help.

They may become offended: Telling someone that they should see a therapist is a tricky say, they may very easily get offended.  Are they putting themselves or others in harm's way?

Depression is not just feeling sad, it can put someone's life in jeopardy. It's OK to ask whether they have thought of harming themselves and don't feel that you have accidentally put this idea into their head.

Show that you care: If the person is feeling worthless or unwanted, the most valuable thing you can give them is to show them how much you care.

If it's serious, ask a professional help: If it is likely to go out of your hands, when you feel that professionals may hand your friend better, go for it.

There's no quick fix: Depression can never be solved overnight or fixed with few conversations, It is common mistake to give up on a friend when they're not responsive.

Don't forget to take care of your own mental health: Being supportive is very taxing, take the time to take care of your mental health. 

Continue to encourage and support them: Keep up the supportive messages, the hopeful words and stick around. Just getting the message that you're not going anywhere can be helpful and encouraging to your friend. 

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9 Books Which Will Make You An Excellent Human Behavior Analyst

1. The laws of human nature by Robert Greene: complexities of human behavior, exploring the underlying motivations and patterns that influence our actions, habits and controls.
2. Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman: Two systems of thinking that drive our decisions: the fast, instinctive system and the slow deliberate system which humans tend to apply for their decisions in life.
3. The Lucifer Effect by Philip G Zimbardo: Examines how human behavior changes according to situations and power dynamics. Drawn from Stanford Prison experiment, explains how ordinary people can commit extraordinary acts under certain conditions
4. Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman: Role of emotions in our lives, focusing on the importance of self awareness, self regulation, empathy and social skills to achieve success.
5. Games People Play by Eric Berne: Its an eye opener, introduces human interaction and games people play unconciously in their relationship in their marital, sexual and professional life.
6. Influence: The psychology of persuasion by Robert Cialdini: Classic, provides the reason and principles behind why people say YES or agree to certain things and how to ethically influence others into something that they on a bright day wouldn't do.
7. The art of thinking clearly by Rolf Dobelli: Humans commit mistakes everyday and often fail to recognize where they went wrong, this book covers just this and explains how to spot tiny errors.
8. Drive by Daniel Pink: This book provides the science of motivation, challenging traditional notions of what drives and encourages us by highlighting the importance of autonomy, mastery and purpose in achieving personal and professional happiness and goals.
9. Predictably irrational by Dan Ariely: Hidden forces that shape our irrational behavior be it the overspending on coffee to cutting coupons for soup cans and meals. It is about rationality, decision making process and human nature. 

10 Novels Which Are Less Than 100 Pages

• The Art of War by Sun Tzu
• Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka (Story of Gregor Samsa who wakes up one morning to find himself transformed into a giant insect. Kafka's work explores the themes of alienation, identity and absurdity of human existence)
• Heart of Darkness by Jospeh Conrad (Charles Marlow as he travels up Congo river in search of Ivory Trader Kurtz. Book explores the darkness within human soul and the bad side of imperialism continues to amaze readers)
• The little prince by Antoine De Saint-Exupery: A child's book 'The Prince' is the story of a young prince who travels from planet to planet. Learning valuable lessons about love, friendship and importance of seeing with the heart.
• The Time Machine by H.G.Wells Science fiction classic, we see a time traveller and two races of people - The Morlocks and the Elois.
• Animal Farm by George Orwell: Orwell uses farm animals to represent various political figures and ideologies, offering a powerful critique of totalitarianism and the abuse of power.
• A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens follows the character Ebenezer Scrooge as he is visited by the ghosts of Christmas past, present and yet to come.
• As a Man Thinketh by James Allen: Teaches people about the power of thoughts and their influence on one's life. He argues that by controlling one's thoughts, one can control their destiny and achieve success and happiness.
• The Old Man and The Sea by Ernest Hemingway: Pulitzer Prize Winning novel, tells the story of Santiago who goes on an epic struggle to catch a giant marlin but eventually ends up losing it.
• Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck: Set during great depression, this book say the unlikely friendship between two migrant workers, George and Lennie as they dream of owning a piece of land of their own. The major themes in the story are loneliness, friendship and the American dream

35 Steps Wedding Ritual

 

1. Pandhal Kaal Muhurtham
2. Paalikai Seeds Sowing
3. Welcoming the Groom
4. Vratham
5. Naandhi
6. Jaana Vaasam
7. Nichchiyadhartham
8. Lagna Pathrigai
9. Mangala Snaanam
10. Ganapathi Puja
11. Navagraha Puja
12. Kasi Yatra

13. Vaaku Nichaya Muhoortham
14. Exchanging Garlands
15. Oonjal
16. Vara Puja
17. Receiving groom in the Mandapam
18. Kanya Dhaanam 
19. Kankana Dharanam
20. Maangalya Dharanam
21. Paani Grahanam
22. Saptha Padhi
23. Pradhaana Homam
24. Ammi Midithal

25. Sammandhi Mariyaadhai
26. Laaja Homam
27. Akshadai Shower
28. Paladhaanam
29. Griha Pravesam
30. Nalungu
31. Wedding Reception
32. The 3 Homams
33. Thaamboola Charvanam
34. Mangala Arathi
35. Kattu Saadham

Pandhal Kaal Muhurtham

This pre-wedding ritual is performed a few days before the wedding.  The bride’s family offers prayers to the deity who is represented by a bamboo pole.

The story behind this ritual is that the Pandhal resting on bamboo poles  had to withstand heavy winds and rain. So, to  ensure a smooth wedding, the bride’s family worshipped the first pole.

Paalikai Seeds Sowing​

One day before the wedding, the bride’s family performs this ancient fertility rite to seek blessings of the nine devatas for the couple’s health and offsprings. Earthen pots spread with Vilvam leaves and Hariali grass are used. 

 

Sumangalis (married women) sow nine types of pre-soaked cereals (for each devata)  in these pots. Post marriage, the sprouted seedlings are spread in a pool or river.

Welcoming the Groom

A day before the wedding, the bride’s family gives a traditional and warm welcome to the groom and his family. A thali (tray) containing flowers, pakku, vetrilai, and fruits is prepared.

 

The groom is received with a sprinkle of panneer (rose water), Chandanam thilakam, kungunam, and flower garland. Bride’s mother welcomes the groom with a milk-based sweet dish called Thirattipal and sings Aarthi.

Vratham

The Vratham ceremony marks the groom entering the next stage or ashram of his life, from Brahmacharya (bachelorhood) to Grihasta (householder). 

 

The ceremony is separately performed by both the bride and the groom. Mantras are chanted to seek protection of the gods – Indra, Agni, Chandra, and Soma. Kappu (holy thread) is tied on the bride’s wrist to protect her from all evil.

Naandhi

Brahmins are invited and honoured with sweets and gifts in this ceremony. Both the families seek the blessings of these Brahmins who are believed to represent the ancestors of the groom and the bride. 

Jaana Vaasam

Jaana Vaasam is a function where the bridegroom arrives in a parade in a beautifully decorated car. He is accompanied by parents of the bride as he reaches the mandapam from a nearby temple. 

 

The procession is filled with music from a band, fireworks,  and dancing children. Through this ceremony, the bride’s family seeks public approval of the chosen groom.

Nichchiyadhartham

Nichchiyadhartham is the official engagement ceremony in Tambrahm marriages. It begins with Ganesh Pooja by the bride’s parents.  The bride is gifted a new sari by the groom’s family. She is adorned with a chandan and kungumam tilak.

 

Her sari gets filled with thengai (coconut), fruits, pakku, vetrilai, manjal, and kungumam. The ceremony concludes with an Aarti and tying a garland around the bride’s waist. 

Lagna Pathrigai

This ritual involves the priest reading the wedding invitation. He announces the names of three generations of the bride’s and groom’s lineage. Other details such as venue and muhurtham are also discussed. After this, an elaborate dinner awaits the guests.

 

Among the Tamil Brahmins, there are different sub-groups. Some of the rituals performed in a Iyer Tamil Brahmin wedding might not be the same as in Iyengar or Gurukkal TamBrahm wedding. The most common Tamil Brahmin wedding rituals are listed here.

Plan the perfect Tamil Brahmin wedding with our comprehensive guide. Learn about traditional Tambrahm wedding rituals, discover Tamil Brahmin wedding photos and videography options, and find everything else you need to make your special day unforgettable. Find all your Tamil Brahmin wedding planning needs in one place, now!

Mangala Snaanam

Mangala snaanam is an important ritual in South Indian weddings where the bride and groom take a purifying bath in the morning of their wedding day. The ritual is performed separately for both the bride and groom at their respective homes. Haldi-kumkum tilak and oil is applied on them by their loved ones before the bath.

 

Among the Tamil Brahmins, there are different sub-groups. Some of the rituals performed in a Iyer Tamil Brahmin wedding might not be the same as in Iyengar or Gurukkal TamBrahm wedding. The most common Tamil Brahmin wedding rituals are listed here.

Ganapathi Puja

As with any other auspicious event, a Tamil Brahmin marriage begins with an invocation of lord Ganpathi – the destroyer of obstacles. 

Navagraha Puja

Families of the bride and groom may invite a priest to perform a prayer to appease the nine astral planets to bless the married life of the couple.

In continuation of the Vratham ceremony, Kasi Yatra is another important wedding ritual. After completing the Brahmacharya ashram, the groom is faced with two options – either to pursue a married life of a Grihasta or to take Sanyas (asceticism). 

 

Under this ritual, the groom begins his journey to Kashi as an ascetic with his humble belongings (slippers, bamboo, fan, umbrella, etc.). The groom is interrupted by the bride’s father, who convinces him of the merits of a married life and promises the companionship of his daughter.

Vaaku Nichaya Muhoortham

Fathers of the bride and the bridegroom face each other, while the priest chants vedic hymns in this Tamil Brahmin wedding ritual. The marriage ceremony is solemnised this way.

Exchanging Garlands

This is a fun ceremony, where the groom and bride exchange their garlands thrice. Friends and relatives of the bride and groom join them, helping them, or making it a little tough to exchange garlands. Groom’s friends might lift him too.

Oonjal is a swing on which the marrying couple sits and rides forth and back. They are surrounded by ladies who sing songs praising the couple (Laali). 

 

The swinging chains are a representation of the unbreakable bond with the divine, and the swaying motion illustrates the ebb and flow of life. Despite these fluctuations, one can find inner peace and stability.

Vara Puja

Vara Puja translates to groom worship. The ceremony involves giving a spoon of milk and banana to the couple after the Oonjal. 

 

The wedding ceremony includes traditions to protect the couple from evil forces and bring good luck. One tradition is throwing rice balls in circular motions in four different directions.

 

Another tradition is women circling the couple holding either a lamp or a container of water. The bridegroom’s feet are washed in milk and dried with silk as part of the ceremony.

Receiving groom in the Mandapam

The groom is welcomed by the bride’s father at the mandapam. The bride’s father washes the groom’s feet, and the bride’s mother applies kajal to the groom’s eyes.  

The bride sits on her father’s lap holding a coconut, and together they offer it to the groom while the bride’s mother pours water over it, symbolising the giving away of their daughter. 

 

The groom’s parents gift the bride a nine-yard sari (Koorai), which she wears for the occasion of tying the mangalsutra. This is followed by the groom assuring the bride’s father of his companionship.

Kankana Dharanam

In a traditional Tamil Brahmin wedding ceremony, the bride ties a string around the groom’s wrist which is wrapped with a piece of turmeric. 

 

This symbolises a religious vow binding them together. Only after the groom’s wrist is tied with the Kankanam can he touch the bride. Afterwards, the groom also gets to tie a Kankanam on the bride’s wrist.

Maangalya Dharanam

In this ceremony, the groom ties Mangala Sutra to the bride. Several rituals such as placing the paddy sack on the floor which is symbolic of material and spiritual abundance and wealth.

Paani Grahanam translates to “holding hands”. In this small ritual, the groom and bride hold each other’s hand while mantras are chanted. Until the mantras are read completely, they must not leave each other’s hand.

A marriage is said to be completed legally only after the ceremony of Saptha Padhi or seven steps. Holding hands, the bride and groom walk seven steps together. The seven steps represent their companionship and friendship for life. 

Pradhaana Homam

Pradhaana Homam or hawan is a ceremony where the couple pays their respects to Aghni devta, the fire god. They ceremoniously walk around the fire, while feeding it ghee and other sacrificial fuel like twigs. Aghni is treated as a witness to the holy union of the couple (Aghni Saakshi)..

Ammi Midithal

Ammi Midithal is a Tamil wedding ritual where the bride steps on a grindstone, with the help of the groom. Stepping on the stone a Mantra is chanted where it is prayed that the bride’s mind be as firm and strong as a rock to handle challenges of married life.

In this ritual, the groom points to the Arundhati star of the Saptha Rishi constellation and Dhruva tara (Pole star)  to show to the bride. 

Sammandhi Mariyaadhai

Here the two families participate in exchange of gifts such as clothes and sweets. 

Laaja Homam

The bride offers parched rice grains to the sacred fire. She then prays for the long and healthy life of his husband. The bride’s brother and other family members help her too. Their participation is an indication of the continued links between the members of their families, after the wedding ceremony. 

Akshadai Shower

Akshadai means the saffron and turmeric coated rice grains. These are showered on the newly weds by elders as blessings.

Paladhaanam

The new couple bows down to seek the blessings of the elders of the family. This ritual also involves offering fruits and a one rupee token to them.

Griha Pravesam

Griha Pravesam is the ceremony where the bride leaves her maternal home to enter her husband’s home. She takes with her the holy fire of the Laaja Homam.

Nalungu

On the wedding afternoon, the newlyweds relax and play together with guests through playful activities like colour paste anointing, fanning, mirror showing, breaking papads, wrestling for a betel pack, and rolling a coconut. These activities showcase their positive qualities such as sporting spirit, strength, kindness  and cooperativeness..

Wedding Reception

After the formal wedding ceremonies, the wedding reception is a casual and informal occasion where guests can meet the couple and congratulate their families.

The 3 Homams

The three havans or homams which are performed during the night time include Jayaathi Homam, Pravesa Homam, and Sesha Homam. 

Thaamboola Charvanam

The Thaamboola Charvanam ritual is a ceremony in which the girl’s brother offers the couple their first betel leaf to chew. This is accompanied by other gifts that are meant to bless them with children and long life. The ritual is aimed at bringing good luck and prosperity to the couple.

Mangala Arathi

To protect the bride and groom from evil eye, a special solution is prepared with turmeric powder and lime. It is circled around the couple and then thrown away. It’s done both during and after the wedding.

Kattu Saadham

The day after the wedding ceremony, the bride’s family packs condiments like dal, rice, coffee powder, pickles, etc. for the groom’s family. They also offer them cooked food like coconut rice, tamarind rice, lemon rice, and curd rice for their journey back home.